Twenty-Two Ways To Feel More Confident, Calm And Collected

Life’s pressures can easily stir up stress, self-doubt, and anxiety. However, with intentional mindset shifts and self-care practices, you can cultivate greater confidence, calm and composure. Here are techniques to help you feel more self-assured and tranquil amid life’s ups and downs:

Use Affirmations

Affirmations are positive statements you repeat to yourself to reinforce self-belief and identity. For example, saying “I am confident” or “Challenges make me stronger”. The repetitive messages train your brain over time. Affirmations are more effective when tied to intrinsic values versus superficial desires like money or status.

Visualise Success

Visualisation utilizes your imagination to create positive scenarios you want to unfold. Picture past successes to boost belief you can achieve again. Envision handling difficult situations calmly and competently. Your mind perceives these vivid visions as dress rehearsals for real performance, strengthening confidence.

Learn Perspective-Shifting Reframes

When you change how you view a situation, its emotional impact shifts too. For example, reframe a mistake as an opportunity to improve rather than prove you are inadequate. Instead of panicking about a looming deadline, view it as a chance to prove your skills. Reframing neurologically disrupts negative thought spirals.

Practice Self-Compassion

Be as kind to yourself as you would a close friend. Accept you’re human, imperfect and that’s okay. Bashfulness about your merits or guilt over decisions that didn’t work out perfectly reflects harshness, not humility. Talk to yourself with compassion, not criticism. You will act with greater confidence when self-acceptance deepens.

Catch Your Cognitive Distortions

Cognitive distortions like all-or-nothing thinking and catastrophising exaggerate negatives and undermine confidence. notice distorted thought patterns and consciously replace them with more accurate perspectives. “I made one mistake, I’m useless” becomes “Everyone makes some mistakes, I can learn from this one”. Such rewiring builds resilience.

Know Your Strengths

Confidence arises from recognising your talents. Create a detailed inventory of your skills, knowledge, values, and personality traits. Ask trusted others what strengths they notice too. Review this list often, adding to it over time. Seeing tangible evidence of your merits makes it harder to succumb to impostor syndrome.

Address Perfectionism

Perfectionism corrodes confidence by imposing unrealistic standards that ensure frequent disappointment. Strive for excellence, not perfection. Making mistakes doesn’t erase your talents. Avoid black-and-white thinking where outcomes are either perfect or failures. Give yourself credit for hard work and progress rather than demanding flawlessness.

Learn To Tolerate Discomfort

Avoiding uncertainty and difficult emotions like fear prevents emotional muscles from strengthening over time through exposure. Let yourself process and release discomfort gradually. Breathe through tough moments without panic. You build confidence each time you endure distress without crumbling, realising you can handle more than you imagined.

Be Assertive, Not Aggressive

Assert your needs and viewpoints clearly but respectfully, without trampling over others. You can set boundaries, negotiate strongly and delegate tasks without ruthlessness. Confidence paired with empathy garners greater trust and willingness to collaborate. Staying assertive but not aggressive builds your influence.

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Track How You Spend Time

Much confidence comes from being productive and purposeful. However, being busy often distracts from focused progress on meaningful goals. Audit how you currently spend time – you may be surprised where hours go. Then intentionally reallocate time towards priorities that align with your deepest values. Directed action bolsters esteem.

Identify And Challenge Limiting Beliefs

We unconsciously absorb limiting messages like “money is tight” or “mistakes prove I’m inept”. When you notice restrictive beliefs creeping in, consciously replace them with more helpful ones like “I have a lot to appreciate” or “setbacks help me grow”. Don’t let old negative programming undermine the confidence you deserve.

Set Mini-Goals To Build Momentum

Major goals seem intimidating. The trick is to break them down into “mini-goals” – small, manageable steps that build confidence through progress. Each task you tick off provides positive reinforcement about your capabilities. Building momentum through small wins is key.

Cut Comparisons

Comparing yourself unfairly against others breeds either arrogant superiority or demoralising feelings of inadequacy. Both diminish confidence. Appreciate others’ strengths without implying your inferiority. And don’t presume you must be better than someone to be worthwhile. Honour your gifts irrespective of where others are at.

Manage Perfectionism

For perfectionists, anything short of flawless feels like a failure, obliterating confidence. Perfectionism also leads to procrastination from fear of not meeting unrealistic standards. Learn to accept and appreciate imperfect progress. Focus on doing your best, not being the best. Your worth isn’t defined by perfect outcomes.

Practice Public Speaking

Few situations evoke anxiety like public speaking as we fear being judged. But every time you get up to speak despite jitters, you build the confidence you can handle discomfort. Take opportunities like virtual meetings to present. The more you expose yourself without catastrophe, the more assured you’ll feel.

Cultivate Self-Efficacy

Self-efficacy means believing you can achieve goals and handle setbacks through persistence. Recall past successes as proof you have overcome hurdles before. Stay solution-focused when problems arise. Savour the power of believing in yourself, however challenging the situation. You’ve succeeded before and will again.

Manage Debt And Save Strategically

Carrying excessive debt and living paycheck to paycheck undermine financial confidence and autonomy, especially with the high cost of living. Make a plan to pay down debts and build emergency savings to cover 3-6 months of basic expenses. Saving and having a healthy credit score boosts confidence you can handle unforeseen needs.

Take Calculated Risks

Fear of failure kills confidence. Restore a sense of brave possibility by taking small risks and transitioning out of your comfort zone – perhaps a creative hobby, networking outside your field or a calculated career pivot. New growth and discovery ensue when you convert passivity to safe, intentional risk-taking.

Set Healthy Boundaries

Confidence comes from defining and defending your boundaries around time, mental energy and values. Say no to people-pleasing requests that deplete you or contradict your priorities. Be firm yet kind. The ability to self-advocate and set limits enables you to operate from an inner stable centre rather than craving external validation.

Find Flow States

Flow is a complete immersion in a productive, energising activity. Identify activities that spark this sense of flow for you like gardening, coding, or hiking. Schedule more time for these flow triggers. The fulfilment attained boosts confidence that you are cultivating natural strengths.

Volunteer For A Cause

Contributing your time and talents to help others bestows a huge confidence boost. Select a volunteering opportunity aligned with your values. Seeing first-hand the positive impact you create fuels self-belief and provides perspective on what truly matters most in life.

In Summary

With intentionality, you can build unshakeable confidence founded on self-compassion, positive self-talk, achievement of meaningful goals and willingness to move beyond your comfort zone. By silencing the inner critic and taking ownership of your innate strengths and abilities to forge growth, you gain the power to live with greater contentment and assurance.

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