When Hildebrand talks about leaving Texas for sunny LA at the age of 17 to pursue her dreams of being a musician, she laughs with an air of disbelief. With an air of someone who still can’t quite believe they were allowed the chance. After a lengthy discussion with her father, and a tonne of convincing, she was well on her way to taking risks and getting messy. The deal being, of course, that she had one year to make it happen, one year, to give her everything. It took guts, but looking at where she is today on the tail end of her press tour for Deadpool and Wolverine (one of the most successful superhero movies of the genre, period) it’s fair to say those guts definitely yielded the glory.

Starting her career on screen as Jen in Annie Undocumented in 2014, Hildebrand’s filmography touts’ range, her roles span from the bitingly sarcastic Negosonic Teenage Warhead in Deadpool that helped put her firmly on the map to the daughter of Satan himself in Fox’s Lucifer, and the raw nerve that is Elodie in Trinkets, each performance multi-faceted and nuanced, garnering well-earned attention that will surely continue to catapult her into the limelight.

A decade later, and three films in, she returns as Negosonic Teenage Warhead. Continuously grateful and counting her blessings, as we delve deep into conversation, it’s clear that she continues to not only be blown away by the success of the movies but the amount of love this franchise gets. It’s been one hell of a whirlwind, and she’s just grateful for the ride.

In conversation with 1883 Magazine’s Dana Reboe, Hildebrand discusses Deadpool and Wolverine, her journey as an actor, the first time she saw someone cosplay as Negosonic Teenage Warhead, what it meant to her to be the first openly queer character in the X-Men Cinematic universe, and so much more.

Thank you so much for taking the time to speak with me today, Brianna! Congratulations on the film. It was great to see you back. I went to see it last night with some friends and we really enjoyed it. When you think about how far you’ve come as an actress from your very first acting credit to Deadpool and Wolverine, how would you say you’ve grown as an artist and as a person?

Oh man, I mean as a person I’ve grown so much just because I started at 17 or 18, so it’s been a decade since then. I feel like these have been extremely formative years. I think they are for everyone. I feel like I’ve made a lot of progress so far. The lesson of my life recently has been learning how to put myself first and learning to listen to what I need as opposed to what I want. I feel like that has also really affected the way I approach work and characters. I feel like it’s given me the freedom to experiment more without being so in my head. A lot has changed over the past 10 years and it’s all been for the better, I would say.

Would you say it’s given you a renewed sense of confidence?

For sure. Deadpool has given me such a sense of direction. It catapulted me into acting and forced me to take it very seriously, which was daunting at first, but now, you know, once you get past the imposter syndrome, at least a little bit, it feels really good. I’ve gotten to a place where I feel comfortable and less nervous to be myself and vulnerable, which I feel like making art is all about.

Absolutely. Actually, taking it back to 2016, for the original Deadpool film, when you read the script, do you remember what your first thoughts were? Did you have any idea that you were auditioning for a Marvel film?

I did know I was auditioning for a Marvel film, in a sense, I knew that it was superhero-related. And I knew my character had powers. But other than that, I knew her personality, I remember reading ‘deadpan.’ But otherwise, I didn’t know anything. When I got the role, and I was allowed to read the script for the first time, I remember being so lost and just thinking, ‘Wow, okay, this is very action packed and super intense’, but it made me laugh a lot. I thought that that was a good sign [laughter]. Because generally, I haven’t seen all of the superhero movies. Before booking Deadpool, I wasn’t one to seek them out, just because I didn’t know much about the characters. I felt lost. There is a whole universe, a whole superhero realm, that these characters live in. I remember reading it for the first time and thinking, ‘Oh, this is different.’ It’s fun and new. It’s exciting for me as someone who knows nothing about anything. So, I definitely thought that was a good sign.

What about Negosonic Teenage Warhead jumped out at you from the script? What was it about her that resonated with you?

She reminded me a lot of myself at the time. I was a very rebellious person. I thought she was very cool right off the bat, right? I thought her apathetic attitude was cool. I really admired her courage. She never seemed to care about what anyone thought or said in response to her. She was always just herself. And whether or not that was very palatable, she didn’t care. I loved that about her.

I love that about her, too! I think learning to be unapologetically yourself is a very brave thing to do. And while she’ll claim not to care, she showed up every time Wade asked her and Colossus to, so… she’s got some softness in her.

I think she’s embarrassed that people could see that, you know?

And that’s why she’s got such a hard exterior. What has been the most wild thing about being a part of this franchise? Did it ever cross your mind that it would be so well-received on a global scale?

No, honestly, [laughs] I mean, so many things about this entire experience have been unbelievable and very lucky and it’s hard to wrap my head around sometimes. I didn’t expect it to be so big. I remember the first one coming out, and I remember filming and us going through budget cuts and thinking, ‘Oh, that doesn’t sound very promising.’ And it seemed like not a lot of people were rooting for this, but the fan response to the first movie was so surprising. Not in the sense that I didn’t know it was a good movie, but I didn’t realize it would be so huge, and now it’s such a big part of the universe and a lot of people’s lives. It’s crazy. I feel so blessed to be associated with it.

When you went to the world premiere in New York City and you were able to watch it amongst your peers and other fans, what was that experience like for you?

That was so fun. I enjoy that there are always a few fans to watch with everyone. Probably my favorite part was getting to talk to them. A lot of the people cosplayed as Negasonic, and that was the best. I think it’s so sweet, and it was so fun to talk to people who are genuinely ecstatic to see the movie. But otherwise, it was great to see my fellow cast members and because we never see each other [laughs], we all live in different places.

Like ships passing in the night.

Exactly!

Taking it back to the cosplay aspect, do you remember the first time you saw someone cosplay as Negosonic?

I’ve always just thought it was super impressive. I think it was at a convention that I saw someone cosplay as Negasonic, I don’t think I realized initially how much goes into making those costumes. But those people are artists they are very passionate, and a lot of them do a great job.

I definitely admire their work and their attention to detail.

It was an honor to see my character as someone else’s cosplay that’s for sure.

Not many actors can say they’ve been a part of both the Marvel Cinematic Universe and the DCEU. What has it been like to navigate these two universes and two separate fandoms?

I feel like both fandoms are full of very passionate people [laughter], which is such a blessing and sometimes very intimidating. I’m always afraid to say the wrong thing, especially when it comes to all of the nuances as far as superheroes and how they’re all connected. It’s terrifying. It’s terrifying for me just thinking about saying the wrong thing, but that’s also because I’m an anxious person, naturally. Everyone I’ve spoken with who is passionate about superheroes in general has always been, very welcoming, super sweet, and just excited. It’s a double-edged sword.

Pivoting away from acting for just a second. You’ve been to conventions, so you’re familiar with fandoms. What are the shows you consider yourself a quote, unquote, fangirl of? Are there any shows that you’re obsessed with?

I’m more of a movie person for some reason. I mean, I’ve watched a lot of reality TV with my friends. And there are certain series that I enjoy. There is one on Apple TV called Blackbird that I was obsessed with last year. But really, I’m more of a movie person. I have a few comfort movies that I’ll throw on now and then, like Juno or Wall-E. Those are the things playing in the background of my house normally.

Excellent choices. I read that you moved from Texas to L.A. at the age of 17, which is a very bold move. Can you talk about making that decision and what that conversation with your parents looked like?

So, at the time, it was just my dad and I at home. And I had been talent scouted, for my music a while before. I started working with a talent scout called Nikki Pederson. And she was getting this group of people together for a competition in L.A. We trained for that. And I ended up doing well in that competition. I also met my first manager there and I remember he said to me, ‘It’s going to be really hard to do this if you’re not in L.A. And I think you should just move out and consider it.’ I talked to my dad about that for a very long time. He was hesitant, but he’s a great dad. He’s always been there for me and he always has encouraged me to follow my dreams. We sort of came to an agreement that I could live in L.A. for a year and if nothing happened, then I’d come back and work for him. Even to this day, I look at him, and I’m like, ‘How did you let me persuade you?’ At this age, if my own child said something like that, I’d be like, ‘All right, well, we’re going to go finish school. That’s what we’re going to do.’ [laughter]

Take me back to filming for Deadpool and Wolverine. I loved seeing Negasonic, Yukio, and Colossus and just about everybody who has touched Wade’s life. Did it feel like a real-life reunion on set? And how much of that birthday sequence was improvised? Because it felt very improvised.

It did feel like a reunion on set! It was so cool to see everyone, especially because it had been so long this time since the last time I’d seen them. And everyone’s worked on new things and they’re doing new stuff. And it was cool to catch up with everyone. Also, you’re right, a lot of that birthday party scene was improvised. I think that there was a good amount of it that was. There’s usually a template. So, they’ll hand out the scenes, which is usually a template, but then there’s always room to play. We’ll have specific takes that are like, ‘Okay, we’re going to have more fun with this one. Or, hey, maybe this time you can say something like this.’ So yeah, we ran through them, you know, as is, but there was time to play and have fun, which was great. They dedicated a few days to just getting those scenes done because there were so many people and so much coverage. It was a fun couple of days.

I would love to see the supercut of that scene.

Me too.

In 2018, during the sequel, it was confirmed that Negasonic was the first openly gay superhero in the X-Men cinematic universe. Can you talk about what that meant to you and why queer representation in media like this is so important?

That meant a lot to me. Ryan (Reynolds) asked me about that early on before they started, or as they were writing the second one. I felt very seen by Ryan at that moment. And I loved that he was open to that. It’s an honor to be trusted with that. I also love the way that it was done and that Negasonic’s queerness is not the only thing about her. She’s also a superhero and she’s also very strong and defiant. It’s important for kids and anyone who feels unsafe being queer to see other people being queer, and maybe even in ways that are not just highlighting their queerness. It’s been an honor to get to be in that role for some people, especially young kids.

It must be. You said in an interview with Backstage that you got hardcore into dramas in the early days and studied them. What did you learn? And what are you watching now, whether it be for fun or work?

I just love dramas. I’m an artist. I feel like all people who are sort of artsy like to poke the wound a little bit. And that’s sort of where creativeness comes from a lot of the time. But I don’t know. I just love to cry [laughs]. I just love watching things that make me a little bit sad. My favorite movie probably of all time at this point is Minari. I feel like a lot of people were talking about it one year, but it’s still so great to me. I can watch it over and over again and feel the same kind of hurt but still hopeful. I really love documentaries it makes you feel like you’re getting a close look at someone’s personal life. I’ve always loved that kind of thing or people-watching, I love sociology-related stuff? I love all of that.

Of your filmography from the Deadpool franchise, Lucifer, Trinkets, and so on, what character did you most connect with and why? What did you feel you were the most connected to?

I played a character named Elodie in Trinkets, and I probably connect most to that character. She was so open, she was the definition of a raw nerve. She was so receptive to everything going on. And I don’t know, I feel like inwardly, that was a great representation of me. She didn’t have much of a guard like most people do. And I loved that about her. And I thought that made her super relatable. She’s probably the closest to my heart and feels like more of an accurate representation of who I am.

What does it take for you to tap into those emotions? What does it take to get there, and how do you leave that at the door at the end of the day?

I think that people say acting is just telling the truth. I think a lot of being emotionally vulnerable requires you to be honest with yourself, and that can be very difficult, especially in front of a room full of strangers with lights and cameras pointed at you, or when you feel like the pressure is on. So for me, something that’s really helpful is music. Sometimes I’ll listen to a song that I feel sends me to a place, and that’s helpful. I can listen to it over and over on set and zone in. Or I journal. Journaling helps a lot too, just to get the thoughts that you’re thinking as the character out somewhere so it’s not just a hamster wheel in your mind. Journaling also helps me wind down at the end of the day or to let it all go. I think part of acting is it’s a craft, so that’s a part of the practice too; being able to let it all go, but then moving on with your day and leaving it there. Practice definitely helps with all of it.

You’ve been acting for over 10 years now. What advice would you give young Brianna, knowing everything you do now?

I would tell my younger self probably just to calm down, just to relax [laughter]. I think younger me took everything very seriously, which is sometimes okay, and that’s great and that’s useful in life. But other times it’s counterproductive. I was really wound up tight about a lot of things and had a hard time seeing the forest instead of the trees. I would tell her to calm down and maybe go on a walk or something, clear your head, and stop scrolling though social media.

I think the getting off social media part is a good one, because it’s so easy to compare yourself to somebody else. It can be a force for good when used correctly, but can quickly turn toxic.

Absolutely.

And lastly, what’s one thing you’d like to manifest for yourself this year?

This year, I told myself I wanted to say ‘yes’ to more experiences. I think a lot of the time something will come up and I’m like, ‘I don’t know if I can do that because I don’t know if I’m going to be working or this and that.’ But yes, I’m trying to say ‘yes’ to more things. I’m going to a few festivals soon and that also applies to work. I’m trying to really take advantage of every opportunity. I’m manifesting continuing to do that.

Deadpool & Wolverine is in theatres now.

Interview Dana Reboe
Photography Thomas Chimney
Styling & Fashion Director Laura Spriet
Hair Matthew Monzon
Makeup Andrea Tiller
Editor Kelsey Barnes
Photo Assistant Alessandro Buzzetta
Styling Assistant Hannah Bressler

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