Living in a city surrounded by millions of people should make finding company ridiculously easy. However, according to More in Common’s 2026 research, only a quarter of Britons feel more connected to their communities than they did ten years ago, while 30% feel less connected.
Sure, you can have colleagues, WhatsApp groups, hundreds of Instagram followers and plans every weekend… yet still feel like most of your interactions never get much deeper than surface level.
That helps explain why people in cities such as London are becoming much more deliberate about how they meet. So, then… what actually works?
Running Clubs & Regular Social Groups
One of the problems with living in a huge city is that it’s very easy to meet somebody once and never see them again.
Regular groups solve that problem because nobody has to organise the second meeting, and you already know everybody will be back next week. Friendships are, after all, considerably easier to build when people keep crossing paths naturally instead of treating every interaction as a one-off networking opportunity.
London City Runners is a good example. Its Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday runs leave from the Marquis of Wellington at 21 Druid Street, SE1 2HH, with different distances available and drinks afterwards. New runners are also encouraged to introduce themselves so they can find somebody running at roughly the same pace. There’s also five-a-side football, climbing gyms, dance classes, choir groups and weekly language exchanges, which all work on the same principle.
Activity-Based Events
Making friends is easier said than done, but having another reason to be there takes away much of that pressure.
Eventbrite’s 2026 social research describes this as “soft socialising”. Among UK respondents, 60% said socialising was important, but they didn’t necessarily want it to be the main focus. Attendance at flower-arranging events had risen sharply, while coffee tastings, craft sessions and other interest-led events were also attracting more people.
It makes perfect sense, really. If you’re learning pottery, tasting coffee, discussing a book or running five kilometres together, there is already something to talk about. That makes interest-based events particularly useful for somebody new to a city. Pick something you’d happily do anyway, then treat meeting people as the bonus rather than the entire purpose of going.
Worst-case scenario, you don’t make a new friend. You still read the book, learnt to cook something or spent an evening doing something more interesting than sitting at home.
Phone-Free Events
Phones are brilliant for finding people, sure, but they’re sometimes considerably less helpful once you’ve found them.
In this day and age, it’s common for people to instinctively reach for their phones, check a notification and disappear into completely different digital worlds while sitting three feet apart. That helps explain the rise of organised phone-free socialising.
The Offline Club now has a London community running everything from screen-free café sessions to dinners and social events where phones are deliberately put away. Some events don’t even force attendees to socialise continuously. People might spend part of the evening reading, drawing or journaling before moving into periods of conversation.
Professional Companionship
Of course, people aren’t always looking for friendship… a visitor in town for three nights may simply want somebody enjoyable to have dinner with. That’s where professional companionship occupies a very different part of the market from dating apps or matchmaking.
Somebody arriving in London for business, for example, might browse the paid companions available on an agency site like London Deluxe. Why? Because what they want that evening is attractive company, conversation and a planned night out rather than a prospective long-term partner.
Traditional dating involves quite a lot of ambiguity. You can match with somebody, arrange a date, and still have absolutely no idea whether you’ll enjoy spending ten minutes together until you actually meet. With professional companionship, though, the practical side of the meeting is agreed beforehand. The date, duration and general expectations aren’t left to develop through several weeks of texting.
The Cost of Going Out Has Changed How People Socialise
Going out has become way too expensive. Recent UK research found that the cost of a typical night out has risen noticeably, while almost two-thirds of Londoners surveyed said they had declined a social invitation because of the expense.
So, if every catch-up involves dinner, £15 cocktails, transport across London and an Uber home, seeing somebody twice a week becomes too expensive. So people adapt. Dinner moves into somebody’s flat, or a Sunday catch-up becomes coffee and a walk instead of a hefty lunch.
This is particularly relevant for people trying to build new friendships. Once somebody has gone from acquaintance to actual friend, inviting them over to yours can do far more for the relationship than constantly finding places to meet.
So, How Do You Find Connection in a Busy City?
The practical lesson is fairly simple: don’t just ask where all the interesting people in your city are. Ask what kind of connection you actually want, and then choose an environment where that sort of relationship has a realistic chance to develop.
If you want proper friendships, favour recurring groups over one-off mixers. If you’re new to the city and hate forced networking, choose an activity where conversation happens naturally. If your diary is the problem, start closer to home. If you’re tired of digital interaction, deliberately choose environments where phones aren’t doing half the social work.
None of those approaches guarantees friendship, romance or even a particularly memorable night… but they do give connection a better chance of happening.
