The dating scene is tricky as is, but the wheels just start spinning in a whole different direction when you’re seeking love in your 30s. While in your 20s, love and relationships seem to be mostly happy accidents. If you think about it, it was easier to meet great guys to date because, for most people, the 20s are the time to have fun. But a decade-older you is also wiser, with different goals, and little to no time for the tomfoolery of the casual hookup culture.
Many bossbabes today find themselves in this quandary. You have a flourishing career, money is flowing, and your skin is glowing. But you can’t stop hitting the same old brick wall of incompatible dates. We know, frustrating!
Women have come a long way and achieved impressive accomplishments only to struggle in their romantic lives. Being a bossbabe may have earned you a degree, a business, and every other thing that you worked hard for. Sadly, (but also not) that’s where you should pause and reflect. You got every “thing,” but a partner isn’t an object you can negotiate a deal on or pass by writing an A+ thesis. In this arena, being a high-achiever, preserving, ambitious woman is exactly what’s keeping you from finding “the one.” Let us explain.
Why many Bossbabes Struggle to Find “The One”?
Women have grown and evolved in a majorly male-dominated world. Today’s bossbabe is immensely educated, well-informed, talented, opinionated, inventive, and an inquisitive citizen of the world. To achieve so much, they’ve had to step out of their comfort zone and into masculinity. To win in a world majorly led by men, they’ve had to think like a man and often hustle like a man. And they won – succeeded in every field they entered. But when it comes to the delicate matters of the heart, this masculinity is the culprit that often keeps high-achieving women from finding the partner of their dreams.
Enter your femininity, consciously.
Bossbabe is a woman who is doing amazing things with her life. She is leading at work, whether in her own business or in corporate, in a courtroom, or in an operating room. She gets things done, and looks good while doing it!
However, as you become that self-sufficient bossbabe, managing everything seemingly effortlessly, the energy in charge here is masculine. While there is nothing wrong with leading through life with your masculine energy, especially when you’re killing it, it may clash with a potential partner’s.
Most women seek a partner they can rely on, not for material things, but emotionally. Men who are secure in their masculinity are natural-born providers. So when a bossbabe meets someone with her masculine energy still dominant (without even realizing it), the man feels their masculinity being challenged, thus causing a clash.
As a high-achieving woman, proud of her accomplishments, you may not need a man, you have everything covered beautifully. But men, as natural beings, want to feel needed.
Here’s where the ego comes in: a bossbabe will say, “I don’t need no man! I can do everything by myself!”
Yes, you can! And more power to you for that. But, do you not want a man?
“Yes.”
Then you’ve got to let him be the man. For you.
Circling back to men and their natural ways of mate selection, the right man will be impressed with all your achievements and support you as you go on to do great things, but after he is invested in your personality. Yes, they are that primitive! And for the best!
Attract the Right Person with Authenticity & Clarity
A bossbabe doesn’t need to list her wins, nor should you announce them anyway. Lead with humility. It’s actually your strong suit. You can visualize your ideal partner and manifest them in every possible way. Still, you will not meet them until you let go of the need for control – a toxic trait, actually.
Have high standards, you can have it all! But not without humility and gratitude for all that you already have and the surprises life throws at you. Carrying a bossy, “not-impressed-by-anything” attitude can come off as arrogant, eventually pushing the perfect partner away.
Know what qualities you want in your dream guy. Is he a provider, emotionally available, reliable? Get very specific about it, and then let go of the need to control, test, doubt, and all those negative mindsets.
So the next time you meet someone, you let him be the masculine as you feel courted in your feminine.